Say Goodnight, Together

During our first few years of marriage, my husband Ted’s favorite late night companion was the website Free Republic.

Free what?

Free Republic. That would be an online gathering place for the politically conservative to discuss the latest in politics.

You see, prior to our union, freeping – as it’s called – was Ted’s go-to, end-of-the-day, wind-down activity. One that he brought with him into our marriage. Most nights, after I went to bed, he’d still be curled up on the couch with his laptop (yep, those were the dark days before iPads) having “spirited conversations” with other freepers.

While there wasn’t necessarily anything wrong with this in his pre-Ashleigh days or even in moderation after our wedding, it meant that our heads rarely hit the pillow at the same time. Maybe one or twice a week. Most evenings I’d head to bed, while he logged in a few more hours of screen time.

Perhaps you can relate. It could be that after that initial newlywed bliss wore off, you and your spouse have discovered that syncing your bedtime routines is a challenge. If so, I’m here to encourage you.

You see, things are now different at our house. Almost twelve years into our marriage, it’s rare if we don’t climb under the covers together. These days, when we say goodnight, it’s lights out for both of us. (Although, I’ll admit that lately we’ve both been spending a few minutes before drifting off to sleep playing Frozen Free Fall on our iPads. It’s rather addicting, you see.)

So how did we get from there to here?

The #1 thing that’s aided us in this change has been … drum roll, please … being intentional to end each day with a shared activity.

[Read the rest of the article at Start Marriage Right.]

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • Kim Hampton

    I really loved this article. My husband and I have been married 9 years, and for a long time, we never went to bed together. We still don’t do it every single night (if he has to be at work early and there’s a great show on that I want to watch) but I can tell we’re closer when we do. If you’re having marriage woes, make it a point to try it at least four nights a week and see if it makes a difference.